Monday, June 15, 2015

Seriously If You Find That Quote Let Me Know. I Am Beginning To Worry About Myself

Longest day. I won't blame Monday though. It's the week or maybe the whole month. 

My old research organisation had organised a Book Launch today. It is perhaps the first book on arsenic contamination written in the vernacular. 

There was an initial hiccup and the event ran the risk of being held at a lounge bar (poor planning on the hotel's part. The co-ordinator forgot to mention there would be an event till 6 p.m at the hall booked for the book launch and they said they could only prep the hall for the launch at 7 p.m) I was there in the capacity of my present organisation. And as I surveyed the bar and the flimsy curtain that would form the backdrop for the headtable where socio- economic perspectives of this "deadly poison" would be discussed,  I couldn't help but let a giggle escape. 

That's when hysteria hit and I haven't stop giggling. The slightest hint of something funny and off I am. I guess that's what happens when the pressure gets to a point you let it escape and it escapes in bursts of giggles.

Jean-Martin Charcot photographed his “hysterical” patients at the Salpêtrière, a Parisian lunatic asylum. Charcot believed that hysterics adopted characteristic poses, and that if he could catalog these poses, he could make sense of the disease.   Augustine, the subject of this photograph, was Charcot's star patient. Charcot published many photos like this one in the Nouvelle Iconographie de la Salpêtrière.
And then I remember my boss showed me this whatsapp message about Lao Tzu advising something along the lines of mosquitoes on penises? I guess it was meant to be inspirational...or something.  And at this point I am beginning to wonder if I am hallucinating. Does that quote even exist? I can't find it on Google. Also Diamonds have cleavage? I should probably get myself to bed. 

Unrelated: It's the baby cousin brother's birthday today. He is in town but this is probably the first time that I haven't shared time with him on his day. I feel like a horrible sister and a horrible many other things. 

Updated: It exists ! It exists! 

OMG...SO relieved. :P 

Friday, June 12, 2015

I write Poetry When It's Rainy. Bad Poetry.

It's Friday night. I have presently said no to two invitations and I did actually end up being busy till 8 p.m. So I don't feel so bad that I lied about being held up. It's been an exhausting month so far. Been thriving can't complain...This week's been a bit weird. Been bumping into little bits and pieces of my past and I've been so very confused. I started writing poetry. That'll happen, especially when you have facy stationary and everything. 

Here's reproducing them in no particular order: 

"If I were to disappear, 
Into a little blip..
Would the earth shatter, would it matter
To those doomed to keep at it? 

And clutch their heart while it beats. 
As it is condemned: to Pain, dear Pain 
Unforgiving, unrelenting. 
The rain pours down in sheets. 

If I were to disappear 
In the moment and never come back...
Would it matter? 
Change how the rest of it unfurled 
To unleash chaos on an unsuspecting house of cards? " 


"Gobsmacked is a funny word. 
Yet one must often find 
In narrow lanes and rain laced window panes
To be hit by occasions, unsuspectingly benign. 
Till one must step back, 
Take recourse to distance. 
Understand that it does not concern 
The idiot that lives under broken bridges of the past
And amid loves lost and gone asunder." 


"An unexpected burst of the city's weariness 
I flee from work with mom. She has also been given an early respite. 
We enjoy the rain. 
A slight feeling of guilt, 
Interrupted by the beauty of the city. 
Kolkata you are unbearably pretty. 
Tendrils of lightening tracing veins through 
The thunderous heartbeat of the sky.
Catch your breath and sigh
Miracles are on their way. " 

Monday, June 8, 2015

Pet Cemetery

The office overlooks a cemetery. It is supposedly one of the most haunted places in Kolkata. Funnily it has been a year and a few months at my place of work, but I'd always chose to go home through a more circuitous route (that involved a 15 minute walk and if bad luck prevails another 10 minutes or so till there's only room for a lot of huffing and puffing and a grateful sinking in to the sweat infused cool comforts of the AC taxi, because fuck buses and everything else). 

Because I'm stupid that's why. 

It is only very recently that I take the straight walk to the oft-frequented bus stand which is roughly a two minute distance from our office. I'm grateful that good sense has prevailed. 

But closer digging of the sub conscious has now revealed why this easy walk has been avoided for the past 12 months. I remember a certain man with pink head phones crossing me on this path and whispering "very.big.boobs" into my ears and that was enough to freak me out because he made it sound like a delicacy. Seriously. I had also been stalked by two men in biker jackets in this very route (not sure if I've written about it here, but that accounts for a whole different blogpost). O and Btw? Kind of related:  That random call at 3 a.m in the night? that I was romanticising about it, thinking the man to be an ancient mouthpiece of unknown languages? Is just a pervert who  calls almost every day now.  ~sigh~  my naivety has become a source of entertainment to me these days.  I went to the phone service provider to trace the calls...and turns out that not only is that impossible but in the off chance that the dude calls again...I could pay 50 extra bucks for each of  the months to follow...and the number will totally pop up then...and I could take this guy to court THEN. Yay profit margins?!! Assholery at its peak much? 

Anyway, I get the drift.. I had my reasons to opt for the more roundabout way. I still do. But these are busy times and the thought that there's a bus just two minutes away from here to get me home is strangely comforting after a long day at work.

Snapshot of Friday evening from the Bus Stop. Cemetery - the green leafy bit to the left. Office is probably the yellow building at front. May be wrong, I am not used to leaving the office when it's still daylight :p 

This two minute walk entails me passing the cemetery. And I wouldn't have noticed ...(yeah that's how desperate I am to get home after work) if it hadn't been for a couple of boys loitering about the streets on their summer holiday. 

At the risk of sounding rather obtuse, I'll just call them boy 1 and boy 2. 

Boy 1:  look to the you see that? 

I look to the right...and for a second I stop too.. 

Boy 2: what is it ? 

Boy 1: that? that my friend is a giant fort of darkness. Stand back and behold it. 

And indeed...there was the entrance to the cemetery...there was the light at the entrance...and that's it. An invisible wall of utter pitch blacketyness had taken over after that and wouldn't let you see through. 

Boy 2: Keep walking...we need to get home before 8:30 p.m remember? 

Boy 1: Please...can we just wait here and watch the darkness for a bit? 

I grinned. "Watched" the darkness for a bit with them... and made my way home. Stronger. Braver.